Doing the "next right thing"

This summer, a woman described what she'd do if she could become sober. She said the standard line, "I'll do the next right thing." We who have some sobriety use that line a lot, "Just do the next right thing."

I learn from people like her. I questioned myself about the way I was spending my days. What was I doing with my own time...was it really useful to anyone? Was it the next right thing?

Of course, I fulfilled the general expectations of my employer. I shuffled papers around, spoke, wrote, traveled a lot, blessed projects, signed papers so obscure projects could be financed. Somewhere my name is folded into dark boxes of records that no one would ever need to read. I also made equally forgettable charts, goals and mission statements and multimedia silliness...just standard administrivia and politics. My days seemed just part of a life sketch, but not a real life, not MY next right thing.

So, I listed people I wanted to spend time with and places of importance for me to be. To fit my calendar, I found that my job was simply in the way. So, I dispensed with that.

I said goodbye to Liesel who moved to Kansas City, and to Molly who moved to Switzerland. Then I left town for a while. First, I needed most to be at my parent's house. Later, Kausik and I needed to see his home and family in India. Over the past few months, I've enjoyed quiet time with good people, seen great landscapes, and some difficult lifestyles.

I've read books. I dug the potatoes. I've been thinking and drawing sketches of succession growth---(you know the scruffy plants that grow after people get out of the way, like weeds, brush, sprouts-- I like that stuff) I've pondered what could be the most likely first growth between those cracks in the road, if someone didn't fill them with tar--it interests me tremendously.

I don't know what I will do next, but there so many "next right things" I will not need to worry over it for long.